Co-Sleeping: What to Expect and How to Overcome Challenges

When my wife and I were first expecting, the topic of “co-sleeping” came very early into question. Basically, you face two options: the baby gets her own room or she sleeps in yours. For us it made more sense to share the room with her, for reasons I will elaborate in the next paragraph. So the next question was: sharing the bed with our baby or putting her own bed in our room? Well, we chose neither and both, that means a bedside sleeper, a sort of half-crib that you can attach to your bed.

Co-sleeping felt more natural to us from the very beginning, and we embraced it without hesitation. The idea of letting our newborn in a separate room alone felt just unnatural, it did not resonate with us. Also, if you want to provide the baby with her own room, you must have it or move to a bigger home. That was not an option for us, because how difficult and expensive it was to get a decent apartment in our region. It might simply not viable for many couples.

So What’s Co-Sleeping?

Co-sleeping is the practice of parents and children sharing the same room or even the same sleep surface. So, it can be also differentiated into room-sharing and bed-sharing. It has a long and varied history. In fact, co-sleeping has been the norm for the majority of human history and remains a common practice of modern parenting around the world today.

However, with the rise of industrialization and the development of separate sleeping spaces, co-sleeping began to fall out of favor in Western cultures. By the mid-20th century, it was seen as an outdated practice and was actively discouraged by many pediatricians. Despite this, co-sleeping continued to be a common practice in many non-Western cultures, particularly in Asia and Africa. In many of these cultures, it represents a natural and healthy way to raise children and to strengthen family bonds.

Today, co-sleeping remains a topic of debate and discussion among parents and experts. While some co-sleeping experts argue that it can be beneficial for both parents and children, others warn of the potential risks associated with the practice.

Benefits of co-sleeping

First of all, co-sleeping can foster a strong sense of bonding and security between you and your little ones. When your child wakes up in the middle of the night, they can find comfort in the close proximity to you. It can also make nighttime breastfeeding easier for new moms. You can easily nurse your baby without having to leave the comfort of your bed, which can help you both get more restful sleep. If you have your baby in a different room, mom is bound to wander all night.

Research has shown that co-sleeping may also have long-term benefits for children, such as reducing the risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS), promoting better mental health, and improving cognitive development. A study published in the journal “Pediatrics” found that infants who slept in the same room as their parents for the first six months of life had a 50% reduction in the risk of SIDS. In addition, co-sleeping can help children develop a healthy sleep pattern. They learn to fall asleep on their own and self-soothe, which can be beneficial in the long run.

Co-sleeping can improve the family’s sleep quality in several ways. For instance, by reducing the amount of time and effort it takes to soothe and comfort a child during the night. When a child is sleeping in the same bed or room as their parents, parents can quickly and easily respond to their child’s needs, without having to get out of bed or move to another room. This can help everyone get back to sleep faster and can reduce the amount of overall sleep disruption.

Co-sleeping can also promote deeper and more restful sleep for both parents and children. When a child feels safe and secure sleeping near their parents, they may sleep more soundly and wake up less frequently. This can lead to better quality sleep for both the child and the parents, resulting in increased alertness and better overall mood during the day.

In addition, co-sleeping can be particularly helpful for new mothers who are breastfeeding. When a mother is able to easily and comfortably nurse her baby without having to get out of bed, she can quickly respond to her baby’s needs and may be able to get more restful sleep in between feedings.

Cons of co sleeping

While I strongly advocate for co-sleeping, I also want to acknowledge that it’s not always easy. It’s important to consider the potential disadvantages and risks associated with the practice. Here are some of the main disadvantages of co-sleeping:

Safety Concerns: Co-sleeping can pose safety risks for infants, particularly if safe co-sleeping practices are not followed. These risks include suffocation, Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS), and accidental strangulation. Infants can become trapped between the mattress and wall, or under soft bedding or pillows, increasing the risk of suffocation.
Disrupted Sleep: Co-sleeping can also result in disrupted sleep for parents and children alike. If one member of the family is a restless sleeper or snores, it can keep others awake. Additionally, if children are waking up frequently during the night, it can lead to sleep deprivation for parents.
Dependency: Co-sleeping can lead to a dependency on the parent’s presence in order for the child to fall asleep. This can make it difficult for children to learn how to self-soothe and fall asleep independently. This can be problematic later on when the child needs to sleep on their own.
Privacy Concerns: Co-sleeping can also pose privacy concerns for parents, as they may feel like they have no personal space or time to themselves. This can be particularly challenging for couples, who may find it difficult to maintain intimacy and privacy in their relationship.
Cultural Stigma: In some cultures, co-sleeping is not widely accepted or may be stigmatized. This can lead to judgment or criticism from family members or other parents, which can make parents feel uncomfortable or ashamed about their decision to co-sleep.

Safe Co-Sleeping Tips

Now, I know some of you may be concerned about the safety of co-sleeping. It’s important to note that co-sleeping can have risks if not practiced safely. Here are some tips that I follow to ensure safe co-sleeping:

Make sure both you and your partner are on board with co-sleeping.
Room-share with your baby without bed-sharing for at least the first six months.
Use a separate crib or bassinet in the same room as you for your infant to sleep in.
Place your infant on a firm sleep surface, such as a safety-approved crib mattress.
Avoid soft surfaces, such as adult beds, couches, or armchairs.
Do not use soft bedding, such as blankets, pillows, or stuffed animals, in the infant’s sleep area.
Be flexible and open to change. Co-sleeping may not work for everyone, and that’s okay. Be willing to adjust your approach as needed to find what works best for you and your family.

Conclusion

In conclusion, co-sleeping can be a wonderful experience for both you and your little ones. It can foster a strong sense of bonding, make nighttime feeding easier, and have long-term benefits for your child’s health and development. However, it’s important to practice safe co-sleeping. Prepare for any challenges that may arise, and not let others’ opinions influence your decision.

So What’s Co-Sleeping?

Benefits of co-sleeping

Cons of co sleeping

Safe Co-Sleeping Tips

Conclusion

Further reading